20 September, 2010
16 September, 2010
There's Something Happening Here
Funny, how it is, that when a lot is happening, I don't have time to write about it.
Rose and I have some rather large decisions looming on the horizon. Stay? Go? Give up? Try something new? Stake a claim? Who knows? The whole time we've been here, I've been telling people that when we made babies and moved from California, it was like we took everything in our lives and threw it all up into the air at once. Now we're just waiting for gravity to do its job; to see where everything lands and if there's anything left of our former lives.
Over the past month, we've seen some things come back into the atmosphere, but they look different now. Some opportunities are still there, others have wilted, some just gone away. Some have grown to seem more viable than before, and still others appear to have come from nowhere. Perhaps they were thrown up by another person or family and while in the air, joined our flock of ideas and opportunities. I don't really know how life works, but I do think I'm mixing my metaphors, and that's o.k. My mind is racing.
I never could've predicted, 15 years ago, that I'd be 32 one day, over-educated, married with two kids, and still have no idea where life is taking me. On one hand, it's exciting; on the other, I feel like Rose and I should just go ahead and solve this mystery.
Rose and I have some rather large decisions looming on the horizon. Stay? Go? Give up? Try something new? Stake a claim? Who knows? The whole time we've been here, I've been telling people that when we made babies and moved from California, it was like we took everything in our lives and threw it all up into the air at once. Now we're just waiting for gravity to do its job; to see where everything lands and if there's anything left of our former lives.
Over the past month, we've seen some things come back into the atmosphere, but they look different now. Some opportunities are still there, others have wilted, some just gone away. Some have grown to seem more viable than before, and still others appear to have come from nowhere. Perhaps they were thrown up by another person or family and while in the air, joined our flock of ideas and opportunities. I don't really know how life works, but I do think I'm mixing my metaphors, and that's o.k. My mind is racing.
I never could've predicted, 15 years ago, that I'd be 32 one day, over-educated, married with two kids, and still have no idea where life is taking me. On one hand, it's exciting; on the other, I feel like Rose and I should just go ahead and solve this mystery.
11 September, 2010
10 September, 2010
Much Better This Time Around
I've felt no greater sense of accomplishment in my life than that I felt last night. It was my second night of taking care of the boys on my own while Rose was teaching. They were fussy, but this time I had a plan. I operated ad libitum, too, but having a plan for when the freak outs occurred made all the difference.
This time, when Petar melted down after his mid-evening meal, I let him cry while I finished feeding Oscar. On Tuesday, nothing I did seemed to keep Petar from crying. So while it was difficult to listen to, I just let him wail for a bit. And after about 10 minutes, he just stopped. He started again a bit later, but by then Oscar had just a couple sips of his food left, so I sat him in the swing chair and went to grab Petar for a ride in the Ergo carrier. This always seems to calm the boys down and it worked for Petar this time, too.
I let Oscar get some upright time, and he seemed calm. After awhile, I swaddled him and put him in his crib. All was well for a time, but then Oscar got ornery. This is where I had to ad lib. I decided I could somehow wear two Ergos (we have two) and carry both boys at the same time. It took some finagling, but I got both on and both in. But the straps of the Ergo on top seemed to be putting more pressure than I liked on Petar's back. So I took them both off and tried another route: both babies in one Ergo.
I'm not so sure if this was the best idea, but after a couple tries - and just trying seemed to amuse the boys to the point where they both stopped crying - I was able to get them both in there in a seemingly comfortable and secure position. And it worked, too; they stopped crying, Petar fell asleep and Oscar was awake but happy.
This experience was a 180 degree turn from Tuesday. That is not to say it was easy by any stretch of the imagination. It was just much better. On Tuesday I felt there was no way I could do this on a full time basis. After last night, I feel like maybe there's a small chance I can.
Now I'm actually looking forward to next Tuesday.
This time, when Petar melted down after his mid-evening meal, I let him cry while I finished feeding Oscar. On Tuesday, nothing I did seemed to keep Petar from crying. So while it was difficult to listen to, I just let him wail for a bit. And after about 10 minutes, he just stopped. He started again a bit later, but by then Oscar had just a couple sips of his food left, so I sat him in the swing chair and went to grab Petar for a ride in the Ergo carrier. This always seems to calm the boys down and it worked for Petar this time, too.
I let Oscar get some upright time, and he seemed calm. After awhile, I swaddled him and put him in his crib. All was well for a time, but then Oscar got ornery. This is where I had to ad lib. I decided I could somehow wear two Ergos (we have two) and carry both boys at the same time. It took some finagling, but I got both on and both in. But the straps of the Ergo on top seemed to be putting more pressure than I liked on Petar's back. So I took them both off and tried another route: both babies in one Ergo.
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| I should probably shave... |
This experience was a 180 degree turn from Tuesday. That is not to say it was easy by any stretch of the imagination. It was just much better. On Tuesday I felt there was no way I could do this on a full time basis. After last night, I feel like maybe there's a small chance I can.
Now I'm actually looking forward to next Tuesday.
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| They seemed happy in there. |
08 September, 2010
Oh Yeah, Two Months
In all of last night's commotion, I nearly forgot that today marks two months of life for the boys. Wow. Only 214 more months until we send them off to college! Just kidding. They're going to Tech School...
Father Fail!
The other day I wrote that things were a little too quiet around here. That was not an issue last night. Last night, in fact, was a nightmare. I picked up the boys from G & G Theisen at about 5:30. Petar bagan crying on the way home and never really stopped until about 8:45. Oscar slept in his car seat until about 7:00, but then cried the rest of the time.
I tried everything: Shushing, swaddling, swaying, the swing, the vibrating chair, burping, changing diapers, tummy time, the radio, feeding, general noise-making, walking around. Nothing worked. Then, about 15 minutes before Rose came home, they stopped. Magically, it seemed. Who knows why. I certainly don't.
For some reason, I feel like I can deal with these sorts of things better during the day. At night, I get frustrated. Maybe I'm tired from work? Though, I didn't feel particularly tired last night, and my job really isn't all that physically demanding. Maybe it's because I'm used to some quiet time when I can do my own thing during the evening? I better get used to not having that.
What made it most difficult for me, is that while all this is happening, I'm wondering how on earth I'm going to be able to survive in Georgia. It was very stressful; my back was tightening up, my mind was racing... When Rose came home and I was telling her about the night, she suggested help from grandparents. That's all well and good, but I feel like I need practice at handling these dudes on my own. Two days and nights per week seems like a good start, I think. It's probably a good thing these guys aren't going to remember any of this.
Maybe it's because I was an only child that I like to tackle things on my own. It's certainly not that I don't appreciate, need, or want any help from friends and family. That is, afterall, why we moved here. But I do feel like I need to take on some of this challenge by myself. Especially because we may very likely be moving to a place where we will have no help at all. At least not right away. Sure, the boys will be older, but I don't think that being five months old necessarily correlates with more rational baby behavior. In fact, add the abilities to crawl and put objects in their mouths, and the task seems all the more daunting.
Anyway, today is a new day, and so is Thursday, at which point, I will try again. And I will do better. I'm extremely reluctant to say that it couldn't be any worse; I'm sure it can. But, at the very least, I've got more experience under my belt.
I tried everything: Shushing, swaddling, swaying, the swing, the vibrating chair, burping, changing diapers, tummy time, the radio, feeding, general noise-making, walking around. Nothing worked. Then, about 15 minutes before Rose came home, they stopped. Magically, it seemed. Who knows why. I certainly don't.
For some reason, I feel like I can deal with these sorts of things better during the day. At night, I get frustrated. Maybe I'm tired from work? Though, I didn't feel particularly tired last night, and my job really isn't all that physically demanding. Maybe it's because I'm used to some quiet time when I can do my own thing during the evening? I better get used to not having that.
What made it most difficult for me, is that while all this is happening, I'm wondering how on earth I'm going to be able to survive in Georgia. It was very stressful; my back was tightening up, my mind was racing... When Rose came home and I was telling her about the night, she suggested help from grandparents. That's all well and good, but I feel like I need practice at handling these dudes on my own. Two days and nights per week seems like a good start, I think. It's probably a good thing these guys aren't going to remember any of this.
Maybe it's because I was an only child that I like to tackle things on my own. It's certainly not that I don't appreciate, need, or want any help from friends and family. That is, afterall, why we moved here. But I do feel like I need to take on some of this challenge by myself. Especially because we may very likely be moving to a place where we will have no help at all. At least not right away. Sure, the boys will be older, but I don't think that being five months old necessarily correlates with more rational baby behavior. In fact, add the abilities to crawl and put objects in their mouths, and the task seems all the more daunting.
Anyway, today is a new day, and so is Thursday, at which point, I will try again. And I will do better. I'm extremely reluctant to say that it couldn't be any worse; I'm sure it can. But, at the very least, I've got more experience under my belt.
05 September, 2010
Mosquito Hill Nature Hike - 09.05.10
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Today Rose and I took the boys to Mosquito Hill Nature Center in New London. This is a place we used to go when we were dating. We'd hike to the top of the hill, throw a frisbee, stomp on bubble wrap that Rose had found in her parents garage. You know, the usual stuff of dates.
The day was unbeievabley perfect: 65 degrees and as sunny as could be. It was our hope to give the boys their six-ish a.m. feeding and then head out for the hike, but of course that didn't quite work out. Nevertheless, we didn't give up on our plans, we just adjusted. We waited until after the boys' 9:00 feeding and then we packed them up, hit the road, and headed out to New London .
It was really nice driving the back roads of the Valley. I've spent a lot of time on many of the roads we drove on a bike, but strangely, I'm usually concentrating so hard on the ride that I don't really get a chance to look around. This was different, and I was reminded how pretty Wisco' country can be.
The hike was short - about a mile-and-a-half - but it was so nice to be out in comfortable pants weather with the boys. They slept the whole time, but Rose and I enjoyed the mini adventure.
I'm really looking forward to fall here in Wisconsin. It's been about eight years since I've experienced a true fall. In Seattle, you get a really protracted fall, and then it starts raining. In Santa Barbara, locals claimed there was an autumn season, but I was skeptical. It seemed like summer there, year-round. Not that there's anything wrong with that; it was great. But being from the midwest, I missed the changes in season. So I'm looking forward to cool, crisp days, Packers games; maybe some mountain biking, and more hiking with the boys.
Truth be told though, I'm really not looking forward to winter at all. After all, it's also been about eight years since I've experience a full winter here. We moved back right at the tail-end of this past winter, so we got just a little taste. So I'm dreading the cold. Of course we may end up moving before too long and avoiding the whole thing, but for now I'm looking forward to more days like this one.
02 September, 2010
It's a Little Too Quiet Around Here
Today is Rose's first day teaching class at UW-Fox. 8:00am and it's really quiet here. There's no sound except for a train coming somewhere from the South, probably heading through downtown, and a ticking clock in the living room behind me. No whirring from the fan or air conditioner, the boys are sleeping. Plus, it's dreary outside, so the whole state of affairs seems a little off.
01 September, 2010
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